Thursday, June 20, 2013

You Can Come Out Of Your Box Now

I love boxes I have a ton of them in my garage right now. They are good for storing items that you want to use for later or for just getting out of the way, like when you need to stage your house to sell it. They are really useful for moving-and Lord knows I have used my share of them for that.

They keep things neat and tidy until you are ready to open them up.

Do you know what else boxes are good for? Memories. Specifically those of people.

I have a tendency to keep people in tidy little boxes in my mind. It's the place where I hold my memory of you captive. Do you do this? Have a memory of someone or a perception of them and it never changes. In my mind that is who they are for infinity.

It's kinda like seeing a child and then not seeing them again for, say, 10 years. And when you see the older version of them you can't believe that all this time has passed and they are now older.  In your mind you still see them as the child, the baby that they were. No way can they be this older person standing in front of you now!

I only recently realized how I was keeping people in my virtual mind boxes. Like in their own little time warp.

I don't like the fact that I keep people stuck in my time machine box, but it's always been this way.

I know I am not who I was one year ago much less 10, so why do I hold other's captive?   I was struck with this realization some time ago and it surprised even me.

But, yet there they are.

This problem has made me wonder, Do I have trouble forgiving and giving grace? yuck.

When I see or hear of  someone from the past I still think of the same person they were way back when, what what they said or did, still feels like it just happened yesterday. I don't give them the chance to show me they have changed because I'm convinced way down they are the same person.

You're in my box. You're trapped.

I would like to think people can change. I want to extend the same grace that I've been given.

If you prove me wrong you are the only fool for not knowing the wrong in your ways.

So, I guess this means it's time to clean house and get rid of the little boxes I have stored up in my memory. I'm ready to let go of my boxes.

You can come out of your box now. Out you go.

I can't hold people captive in my mind anymore. It's not fair to assume that people never change, grow, or mature. Or aren't even sorry for the ways they've hurt you in the past.

I'm going to allow you to grow and be the older and wiser version of yourself. your welcome.

There may be things about your personality that I don't ever like or agree with. But no one stays the same.

Most of us are sorry for things we have done in the past even if we don't get the opportunity to say the words to the person we offended.

With grace, and by the grace of God, I'm letting you out because I don't have any more room in my head for things that don't really matter.

I'm filling that space with things that do and with things that count.

So, there you go, I'm opening the boxes, and flinging them wide open. You are free. Free to grow and be who you are, no longer my little captive. I wish you the best.

And I'm going to try and keep my head box- free from now on :)

Do you have any old perceptions of people that maybe it's time to let go of?

Linking with #TellHisStory, Imperfect Prose, Thought Provoking Thurs, Fellowship Fri, Faith Filled Friday, A Little R&R Wed


  1. Forgiveness is hard, but so healing! My pastor used to say that holding a grudge was like drinking a poison and expecting someone else to die.

    Stopping by today from We were blessed to link up after you at Thought-Provoking Thursdays.

    1. Thanks for stopping by!I've heard that quoted before and was really struck by, it's an interesting way to look at unforgiveness.

  2. What an interesting thought to ponder! Thanks for making me think.

  3. I have done this yes, but I also have someone do this to me and it is hurtful. We don't get to see one another very often but the more time that goes by without getting to see her it's like she makes allllllll this stuff up in her head about me and when we do see each other she is right out angry but then as time goes by she realizes once again that it is just Marlece, nothing has changed in who she is as a person and then after time she is happy again.

    Yah, it hurts....but I've learned to give her time to reprogram the brain again.

    We talk way to much in our head at times don't we?

    1. How crazy! Our minds can be our biggest enemies can't they? I know it hurts to box people in and it's not fair, it's something that I'm working on bc I don't want to have unfair perceptions of others. It's always good to see you here Marlece.

  4. Dear Alecia
    I don't know if you battle with the same thing I do, but I have boxed myself also in a neat little box by looking at my perceived perceptions of myself all through the years! That is a difficult box to get out off, but with our God's abundant grace, I am slowly but surely succeeding.
    Much love XX

    1. Very interesting, I guess I didn't think about myself being boxed in, but now that you mention it I do that too. Thanks for coming by Mia, much love and grace to you.

  5. Oh this made me stop and ponder if I do this. People do change and its amazing how often I hear those words that people don't ever change. He's in the business of transforming! Love this thought of freeing our mind from the boxes we may hold people in.

    1. Yes he is! Freeing for us and others. It's good to see you Beth :)

  6. I loved this, really loved this. Signed up for everything you have, lol. Thank you.

    1. Thank you Nannette, I'm so glad you have joined me on this ride :)

  7. One of the Bible study groups I am in is studying Chuck Swindoll's "Grace Awakening" series. Your post reminded me of some of the things we have been covering.

  8. Mmm, what an interesting idea! I'm sure there are some people that I need to let out of the box, too. :)

  9. What an important message!! One we all need to hear. I think often that's what keeps me from believing God loves me... I think he's just like me, and has ME in a box but he doesn't. His perception of me is fluid and he purposely forgets our sin so he might love us fully in the NOW. love you Alecia. e.

  10. What a wonderful post, great analogy and so relevant! I had never thought of this as putting that person in a box - this has given me much to think about!


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