Tuesday, December 11, 2012

I'm Me...And That's OK

When I look into his sweet baby blues, I see his daddy looking back at me. His smile and dimples are mine, so is his innocence {or some would say gullibility}. He believes what people say and takes them literally and at their word.  He's contemplative and likes to think things through before he makes a decision. In the early morning hours you will {sometimes} find him reading in his room while others sleep.

Her stunning hazel cat like eyes are those of her great grandfather, I used to call him Paw Paw before his life was struck short in an automobile accident. She sees the world in black and white, and challenges me daily to live by grace. Her nose and chin she inherited her from her great grandmother on the other side. And that strong will, double doses from her grandmother and grandfather! :)

We often say to them "your just like so and so, or you remind me so much of me at that age." It's a reminder of where they come from, their heritage of roots that run deep.

As adults we hear those words, and we flinch in protest. And get all mad and self righteous and set out to prove those words wrong.

We will spend our entire lives running and striving to be different. How often have you said "I will never become my mother"only to wake up and realize you have become just that {Hi mom!}.

And yes, in a lot of ways I am like my mother, and my dad, and others before me, but I'm also me.
There will always be things that I want to change, and I can only pray with God's guidance and wisdom that I will become a better version of who I really am.

Our parents aren't perfect, and God knows how many mistakes I make that will come back to bite me one day. But, there's freedom in the acceptance of self. There's freedom in the grace you give yourself and extend to others.

Keeli may one day find herself saying "I hope I don't act like my mom" and she may try really hard to be the opposite of me, but there will come a day when she will realize who she is, and who I am, are all part of what's been handed down generation after generation, and that it's not as bad as she once thought.

Our genes are the backbone of who we are, but they are not all that we are. It's up to us to write our own stories and leave our own mark on the family tree.

I'm me and that's good

Thanksgiving break we took the kids to the movie Wreck it Ralph.

The main character Ralph didn't want to be him anymore, and he went to great lengths to prove he was something more. More than what others said he was. He knew deep down he wasn't a bad guy and he set out to prove it. I won't give away any details in case you plan on seeing it, but the message of the movie for me is that we can work hard to prove to others what we are or aren't, or we can see the good and bad and work on those, and accept ourselves as we are.

One of my favorite lines in the movie is from Ralph "I'm not good and that's OK, but I'm me and that's GOOD."

Accept and embrace your unique, one of a kind God made self. Everyone else, they're just struggling to do the same.

Do you have trouble accepting  certain parts of you and wish them differently? Do you fear becoming one of your parents?  Please share in the comments.

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  1. oh my goodness, is this the truth of the matter or what? You think you are all ME and then you look in the mirror one day and you go, "I'M MY MOM!" ha! Sure makes one look at what kind of actions you are protraying doesn't it? I love this though, generational this and thats can be such a blessing and sometimes a curse (smile) but I don't think you truely embrace them until you get a little older. Great post, loved it!

  2. lol, I agree, I don't think you can embrace them until you are older!
    Thanks for coming by Marlece.

  3. I still cringe occasionally when my husband tells me I am acting/look like my mother. But coming to that place where I can see the influence without being tied to her decisions is such a great place of peace.

    1. I'm sure most of us do! But like you said getting to that place of peace with it is key, sure there are going to be those influences, but we aren't carbon copies. Thanks for sharing!

  4. I think I used to worry about this until I had my own children. Then I realized one day they'd be critiquing me. Ahh! I like the emphasis on individuality here, too :)

  5. I asked my sons the other day if there are "labels" that I put on them that they don't like or feel are not true. They couldn't really give me an answer, but I hope that they think about that and we discuss it more. And I hope that they embrace who they are and not who people tell them they are. But as you've said so eloquently here, there's much about who they are that is inherited and I hope they embrace that part too. :) Thought-provoking post, Alecia!

  6. Alecia, I love this post for it and the replies this happens with everybody. The older I get the more of my Mom I see in me and my daughter says shes see me in her. I stopped trying to be someone else a long time ago and love the freedom of it. Yes, yes, yes I am a part of those who have raised me, so there is some good and some bad. But I think we all can trace it all back to the first mother and father, Adam and Eve. Those same failing they had we still have...the choices they have, we still have...the same amount of love from God we still have. I love that I am an exhortvert and now an introvert like my husband, love he is an introvert now but it took me a few years to get there. I love to hear my children say the same things I have said to them to their children. Good post my sister..you are a wise women. Blessings

  7. Thank you Betty. How we can grow and mature over the years is all that matters, and hopefully embrace where we came from. Thanks for leaving your thoughts here Betty.

  8. This is pretty funny... you're so right that for a while the 'you're so like your xx' is cute, then a source of angry rebellion, then resignation. And never entirely true! Great illustrations!

  9. I've often thought lately, "I'm my momma!" How does that happen? I see me in my daughters sometimes, too. But we all three have our own uniqueness--and that's good!

  10. we are woven together, aren't we? the good and the bad, ourselves and our influences.

    we do write our stories. i like that line. there is freedom and promise there, in becoming the people we were created to be.

  11. oh friend, your children are so precious, so beautiful. i see such wisdom in your girl. such strength in her jaw.

    1. Thanks Em, she came into this world knowing everything :) She's a fighter and stands up for what she believes in, I've always just tried to bend that willful spirit and not break it.

  12. Your children are beautiful and I love your insights. How lucky they are to have such a considerate and observant mama!

    1. Thank you for coming by! and your sweet words, I can't wait to see what your blog has in store, I love that it's devoted to tweens!! Good luck with it!


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