Thursday, December 22, 2011

Raising My Strong Willed Child {without losing my mind}

They can pushy and opinionated. Sometimes giving very little thought to what others think or want. They can be selfish and manipulative.
I have a particularly very strong willed child. She has challenged me from the time she was first placed in my arms. Refusing to be put on a schedule. Needing constant attention, always wanting to be held, didn't like to be alone {forget about self entertaining! ha}and was admittedly pretty draining at times {a lot of times}.

She can see through you like you were made of glass. There is never any pulling the wool over this child's always watching eyes.
She challenges every decision, opinion, every move we make is closely scrutinized.

There have been times when  I cried out to God, WHY?!? why is she so hard? I. can't. do. this. I'm not smart enough or strong enough. What make you think I could handle her, raise her without losing my sanity and without breaking her? Before her I was not so patient. I've learned to bend. to wait. Because with a strong willed child it's all about waiting them out! Not blinking first.

Reminding myself {and her at times} that I'm the adult and my husband and I do have the final say, does help. She wears me down fast. She is a little adult in a child's body and doesn't like that she doesn't have a say in all decisions like she wants to.

The days can become one long-drawn out battle after another if I let it.  There are days I wonder if I'm getting through at all. Am I making a difference? I know she's listening even if she is pretending not to.

 But the truth is she wouldn't be mine if HE didn't think I could make a difference in her life. He knew I could do it even before I realized I could. He knew I was capable when I didn't think I was. She brings out things in me that I'm not comfortable with. She forces me to step out of my comfort zone and into her extroverted world of fearlessness.

 My daughter loves big. She is kind and generous. She is a great friend to those around her. And has a heart for the less fortunate. She listens. On those days when I think nothing is getting through, I think about all her wonderful qualities and am reminded that, I am. I do. I am capable enough.

Strong willed children will grow up to be leaders. Leaders of what is up to them. I pray for more leaders of good.  Light leaders. My daughter will make a great leader.

I came across this strong willed child prayer from Kristin click over at Chasing blue skies to read it, you'll be glad  you did!! I sure was, I printed it off and keep it in my bible to read from time to time.


  1. you are invited to follow my blog

  2. I've always said Keeli should have been Chad's. They are two peas in a pod. When she becomes a teenager you will double bless her for being a strong willed child.That's the time you will want her to be the leader and not the follower. Leaders forge paths, followers just go down the paths already taken. A wrong path taken can have a negative influence on a child for the rest of his/her life.Believe me as a high school teacher, I see too many children going down the wrong paths following the wrong leaders.

    I can not help but wonder -no that's not right because I know- what may have happened in a child's life that could possibly foster so much anger to cause the child to ficiously attack two teachers in my school last week. Wish she had met someone like Keeli sometime in her life to lead her down a path well chosen.
    I love you, Mom

  3. I agree, I know she will make a great leader if she chooses to. I just pray we survive raising her with nerves still intact! :)

    How are the two teachers? Are they ok? It's sad that so many kids today feel neglected and unloved by the most important people in their lives, one person really can make such a positive difference in their life! Your in a great position to influence and I know you are doing what you can!

  4. Wow!! I have two daughters, and my youngest who is now 17 is a very strong willed child. I promise you, every word you wrote is her to a "T"!!! I know she will be a srong leader for Christ, however there are days that I feel I will not make it to the next level with any hair left on my head. Teenage years are rough, more so than I remember at her age. Thank you for sharing, as today is one of those days I feel like I will need a wig before Friday gets here!!


    1. Me too girl, I'm surprised I still have any left and she's only 11! They're tough but I think that means the payoff will be even greater :)

  5. Thanks so much for the shout-out, Alecia. I need the reminders tucked inside that prayer more than anyone! Keep up the good work, mama-extraordinaire. You BLESS.

    1. Thanks Kristen, your prayer was a blessing! and was more than happy to share it with others. Thank you for your kind words!!


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