Friday, November 8, 2013

Truth-FMF

Five Minute Friday

Truth-
Truth is that I started working full time this week at a job that seemed perfect....and I hate it! And I feel guilty. Guilty because I've prayed and cried out to God for work and he answered. And now all I want to do is quit. (Which I am, bc I have to go home for Thanksgiving and need off, but being new I have no vacay or personal days stored up. I will give my two weeks notice today and resume job hunting after the holidays (pray for me?) )

I hate that I should love and appreciate it because I get to work from home while the kids are at school, but I don't. I feel ungrateful and discontent. Others would give anything for a job like this, so why can't I be happy?

Truth is right now I'm still in a place of figuring out my place. I've been in our new home for a year now and it still does not feel like home. I'm wondering when this grey cloud is finally going to lift and I will feel like me again.

Someone that likes her life, makes the most of bad situations, tries to find the good in everyone and everything.

I still had some posts left in my Fearless series, but I haven't had a moment to really sit with my thoughts and write since this time last Friday. So the series is hanging on day 22 right now. It may stay there...end there.

I got further than I thought I would so I'm proud of that.

This is the truth of my life right now. It's different than I thought it would be. I'm not really liking it.

Thankfully God holds the hand of the needy, and I'm so very needy right now.

And I'm thankful for new friends, online friends, and far away real life friends, and family that are praying for me and encouraging me.

I have so much to be thankful for.

5 comments :

  1. Alecia,

    So many of us can relate to being in a place where we think we "should" feel better but don't. I applaud you for acknowledging what is true for you regardless of what your head is telling you that you "should" feel. Lots of love and light coming your way.

    Melody Joy

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  2. Stopping over from FMF - such a lovely and very honest look at your current truth. I hope things get better for you and you find the job of your dreams!

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  3. It sounds like you are making a very important decision and are seeking God's face. I can empathize with your mixed feelings, I find myself in that place all the time. I pray in Jesus' name that your house will become a home and you will find that peaceful, grateful place in your soul. Right there w/ya! Blessings, a FMF buddy, Cindy

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  4. Alecia, sending hugs your way and lifting you up in prayer. Much love to you.

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  5. Hi. Thank you for visiting my blog. Oh, I can so relate to many feelings you expressed here. I have found myself feeling how you have felt off and on again after moving to a new town in Colorado...a place so culturally different and slower from where I was...it isn't really the place or the people, but my expectations. I am praying for you to feel that God is meeting you right where you are at, holding you and providing. I pray for you to have joy and peace and to clearly know where God is leading you at this moment. Hugs!

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