Wednesday, April 11, 2012

Can We Agree To Disagree?




What I believe and what works for me and my family, may not be what you believe and may not work for your family.

I may be a stay at home, that is my family's choice, but I don't look down on you or think I am any more holy because you work a full time job and have kids to take care of. Actually I'm in awe, that you balance everything so well. I know I couldn't.

I may not home-school, in fact I  look forward to the time the kids are at school. There! I said it!
 I can get things done, focus on me a little and am ready to be the best mom I can be when they run through the door in the afternoon. I don't feel guilty for not homeschooling. And I don't think you are any better than me or holier if you choose to do so.

We don't send our kids to a Christian school. Right or wrong this is our choice. It's hard because sometimes I would love for them to be in that environment for school, but really, I feel it's my job to teach them things about the Lord. Not the schools and not the church's; even though it's nice that they can come along side us and reinforce what we are teaching at home. I know a lot of people that went through school in a Christian private school and they are not any closer to God than those that didn't.

It's all a matter of heart. What's in your heart? What is God telling you to do for your children, for your family?

Whatever it is trust that you are doing the right thing. As long as you are following God's leading you are doing the right thing!

"Therefore let us stop passing judgement on one another. Instead, make up your mind not to put any stumbling block or obstacle in your brothers way." Romans 14:13
Unless someone is going directly against God's word {like having an affair} maybe we need to keep our mouths shut.

"...Blessed is the man who does not condemn himself by what he approves." Romans 14:22 {emphasis mine}
And just love each other. Regardless of our differences.
"Don't just pretend that you love other. Really love them. Hate what is wrong. Stand on the side of good. Love each other with genuine affection, and take delight in honoring each other." Romans 12:9
When we get caught up in whose right and whose wrong this causes divisions. Can we agree to disagree?
Knowledge makes us feel important, it's Love that builds up the church.

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs." 1Cor 13:4-5
I recently read a blog post that I respectively disagreed {and kept this disagreement to myself, what purpose would it have served to get into a religious debate with her?} with the author on a decision she made regarding allowing a sponsor onto her blog. She has every right to make decisions about what's best for her blog especially if that something doesn't align with her beliefs. And it made me realize that what she believes to be right and what I believe to be right, while they maybe different, neither of us are wrong. We each believe according to what the Holy Spirit guides us in believing.

"It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery." Galations 5:1

Comparison trap is ugly, don't you think?  It's makes us feel less than.
Jesus came to give us life, so that we may live it fully!

I would love to hear what you think about this.

Love is the tie that binds us together. Let's build each other up instead of tearing each other down. If we can't live and be differently than the world, then how can we influence and love others to Jesus?




Linking up today with::  Deep Roots at Home,Raising Homemakers,Women Living Well,Winsome Wed,Imperfect Prose,Word Filled Wed,God Bumps & God Incidences. Thankful Thursdays,Hearts4Home,Proverbs31Thursdays,FaithFilled Fridays

45 comments :

  1. "As long as you are following God's leading you are doing the right thing!"
    that is exactly it...what one family is called to do will be totally different than another family....we just need to be sure our hearts are in tune with the Lord's and to not cast judgement when it looks different to our own calling!
    well said...and gutsy, i might add! love your thoughts today

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  2. LOL! Thanks Kerri. After rereading it after I hit 'publish' I thought it might ruffle feathers too, it's not my intention to do that. It's just an honest opinion. How right you are about not casting judgement on others when their life looks differently than ours!
    Thanks for the sweet comment

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  3. i def think we can get caught up in how we thing our way is the right way...and it probably is for us, but we have to be open that others way may work for them as well...the key here is conversations too as they lead to understanding instead of us making a judgement from a distance...

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    1. Absolutely! Communication could clear up so many problems because you do get a better understanding of the other person's viewpoint. Thanks.

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  4. When all is said and done...Love will be the only thing that stands...not being right...but loving well....I need to continue to grow in this myself. great post...blessings~

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  5. Thanks for being willing to share your heart today. The Lord has been teaching me that as much as we need to not be judgmental toward others on matters that are not related to the Gospel, we also need to respond in grace to those who've made decisions they feel certain of for their families and lifestyle. I think you're Scripture references really capture both these points. Thanks for sharing!

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  6. I grew up with this philosophy of agree to disagree...and it works for me. I may not always see eye to eye with a fellow believer and that okay. It's not about us anyway. It's all about living for Him.

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  7. wow, friend... i love this. i love your heart. i long for the church to feel this way too... i pray, one day, it might. so inspired by this; thank you. (and so good to 'meet' you!) e.

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    1. It's nice to 'meet' you too emily! Thanks for the chance to link up over at imperfect prose.

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  8. "As long as you are following God's leading you are doing the right thing!"

    Nicely put!

    I wonder why we seem to have such a hard time trusting other believers to be able to hear God's leading for their lives?

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  9. Hi, stopping by from EOA Wednsdays!

    I LOVE this post! I agree with you wholeheartedly. It's so easy to be like the Pharisee's, I'm so guilty of it! But God has been slowly leading me into the gracious understanding of FREEDOM in CHRIST.

    Love this so much, made my day!

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  10. Bless you a million times for this post. I loved it right from the title. I feel so disheartened sometimes by the divisions we create, not just among people of different faiths, but even among, and sometimes especially among, people of the same faith. What sense does that make?! Your post is full of wisdom and compassion. Surely this is what the Bible encourages. "Judge not" is a pretty unequivocal statement! As is the commandment to love everyone. I hope everyone who reads this will take it to heart.

    (By the way, I'm following your blog now.)

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  11. Thanks Galen! Your right they are divisions that we create among ourselves and they can cause so many problems among us and we can be a stumbling block to those that aren't Christians because they aren't seeing any difference between us and them.
    Blessings to you!

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  12. oh, i have heard a lot of talk lately in the blog world about comparison. and you are right--Satan uses it to harm us. we should only be concerned what God thinks of us--what He is whispering gently in our ear. its so important to have the grace to not only accept but to respect people for who they are. thanks *so much* for your words at my place. blessings!

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    1. It's easy to compare, especially when your just starting the journey on something and you are looking at what others are doing and how further along they are than you. You start to lose sight of why you started to begin with. Grace-that's it, that's the key.

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  13. This is a wonderful post and should e published in Christianity toady :) I wholeheartedly agree. We so need to accept that other people have different convictions, and that is OK. Any comparison bring separation in relationships and that is not what the Lords want. I love the scriptures!

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  14. Sometimes as Christians we can be harder on eachother then we need to be.

    I agree, It's about your relationship with the Lord.. and I'm a sinner just like you, who doesn't need to judge what your doing! :)

    It's the whole speck of dirt and log reference! :)

    Anywho, I think if Christians spent more time support eachother then worrying about eachothers differences how wonderful that would be.

    I am the homeschooling mama of 5 number 6 on the way...and support another christian sister in her endevors!

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  15. Bless you! I think it's great you are homeschooling all of your kids, you definitely have a full plate before you, and I am in awe of you! And your right what a wonderful world it would be indeed! Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

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  16. Amen! And I feel freedom in reading your views on school, which happen to match mine, but more importantly, that you feel free to share them. ;)

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  17. yes, exactly. we need to give each other--our ourselves--a lot more freedom to live into our own lives and choices. grace, grace.

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    1. You said it. It's all about grace.

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  18. So well said. Why do we (in the church) feel it necessary to compare ourselves to each other by denigrating one another. Insecurity, that's why. Gal. 6:4 "Each one should test his own actions. Then he can take pride in himself, without comparing himself to somebody else,"

    Thank you for this : )

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    1. Insecurity, pride, jealousy? I'm not sure, but we have to move towards love, real genuine love for each other.

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  19. I love this because I feel that all too often people do not try to look at another's point of view as valid. Even myself, as much as I strive to be understanding, still need to remember His grace in ALL circumstances. Thank you so much for this gentle, but firm, challenge!

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  20. Yes! We must major on the majors {Christ crucified, buried, and risen} and minor on the minors {homeschooling, etc.}. We are called to love each other first and foremost for that covers over a multitude of sin. We must teach our children's God Word and bind it upon their hearts. Great post!

    Blessings,
    Lori

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    1. I love that "major on the majors and minor on the minors" Thanks for stopping in!

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  21. I applaud you for having the courage to tell it like it is. And love is first and foremost. I am not loving someone if I am judging them. We can agree to disagree.

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    1. Thanks-after rereading I thought everyone was going to hate this and almost deleted. But I kept it and am so thankful I did. It seems to have resonated with people and for that I'm thankful. Your right it is so hard to love someone if we are judging them

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  22. Hi Alecia - I am so with you on the time when they are at school :) I believe that God has a unique plan for each person and each family and you are answerable only to Him. Great post and thanks for linking it up. God bless and look forward to seeing you there again next week :)
    Tracy

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    1. Agreed, we only answer to Him, let Him convict us if we are wrong. It's not up to us to judge each other, by what we think is right.

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  23. Agreed! Comparison is never, ever healthy. We have so much common ground as Christians, yet we get stuck on the little things. I love how Lori said it in the comment box here, major on the majors, and minor on the minors.

    Really glad you've linked.

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  24. I think freedom scares us, and so we build fences to keep ourselves safe and others out. And that sure isn't love is it! Here's to freedom and fearlessness in Christ! Loved the post :)

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    1. I agree, freedom can be scary. I get scared by it myself and have to keep checking myself to make sure I'm not getting caught up in keeping the rules or trying to earn God's love. I'm His child and I can't earn His love, it's the same with our kids we love them because they are ours, they don't have to work to earn our love, we give it to them freely. Thanks.

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  25. Love it! I needed to hear this. I am constantly telling SAH moms, way too eagerly: MY HUSBAND IS A SAH PARENT CAN I PLAY WITH YOU??? But that would be if I had time. And I don't because I'm constantly torn between working well and moming well and doing neither very well at all. And I have also noticed that when I'm talking to homeschoolers I very quietly admit we're sending our oldest to (gasp) public school. Like I'm sending her to a den of zombies or something. Where do these ideas of mine come from?? Thank you for this!

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    1. LOL! Your comment made me laugh! How cool is it that your husband is a sahd!? Public school, yes I know what you are talking about, I cover my kids in prayer along with their teachers and their friends each year. And it gives us A LOT of opportunities to talk about things and let me speak truth into their lives. Their teachers tell me every year, how my kids are 'lights' in their classroom, and how much the others kids respect them.
      I'm sure you are doing MUCH better than you give yourself credit for!! Thanks for stopping over, God Bless!

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  26. Very well said, Alecia. I think choices should fit the individual families and what works best for them, as long as its inside God's principles. (I found your blog through the Beholding Glory blog linkup.)

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    1. Thanks Laura! I agree and in giving grace to other families that don't do things the way we do them, frees us up and them to do all the God has planned for each of us. We shouldn't live in fear of being judged by our fellow brothers and sisters in Christ.

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  27. I featured ya today...come grab a button!
    http://passionateandcreativehomemaking.blogspot.com/2012/04/beautiful-thursdays-link-up_19.html

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  28. The human in us has a hard time discerning between comparing and judging, doesn't it. It's too hard for me to compare and not try to come to a right/wrong conclusion. Because we can't see other's hearts. We try, but let's face it...we fail miserably.

    What a blessing to live in a free country where we can make the best decisions for our own unique family! It's worth celebrating, indeed.

    beautiful post!

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